Finding my Desteni and A New Way

I joined the Desteni forum in September 13, 2007, I am 58yrs old. Before that I had pretty much had it with life. I lived a radical non-conformist life, but always in the back of my mind I wanted to know why we are here and why are we so abusive to each other. I could not believe we were still killing each other in wars. When Bush JR got elected, that is when all hope of humans doing anything for the good of life went out the door for me, and I started to give up within myself.
Way before that, some 30yrs ago I was also on a “spiritual” search, because I thought there had to be more than this abusiveness in the world and I wanted to know how to be happy and help others if I could find the “way” or truth. Interesting some 25 years later I ran into Desteni who is now 4yrs old since their website. So while going down into depression right before I started with Desteni, I was trying to keep my head above water, I was still searching on the Internet for something to make sense to me. A friend of mine, emailed me one of Sunettes videos. I was intrigued and watched more.
I found myself on the forum, a newbie, asking questions, as I never heard anyone talk or say the things the way they did. I wanted to try and learn about self-forgiveness and self-honesty. I did lots of research, watching videos and reading posts. They also started talking about an equal money system. Of course I loved the idea, it would solve all the fucked up shit going on. People could be happy! ALL people would treat other and themselves as equals. I always thought that this is way it should be.
When I was doing Advaita and other such light and love things, I felt something was missing. Why should I find happiness only for myself and not care about others. I just didn’t seem right. This is the point Desteni address where no one else does. Heaven is in our head - earth and Us, you and me are HERE. Thus to bring the idea of heaven from the head to HERE, physical, is the only way to actually LIVE it. Thus I have been learning to stop participating in the mind that is fueled with emotions that cause us to live in fear and separation of each other and life. The tools Desteni uses are simple- yet SO EFFECTIVE if done with sincerity. They are writing self to freedom. Self Honesty, Self forgiveness, Breath count, and corrective action.

The cool thing with Desteni - is that we are a group from all parts of the world who do want to bring heaven to earth for all of Us here. And we support each other within this to make a change in ourselves and then the world.

Some of my favorites when I first started with Desteni:
Osho
Why Changing the world Will not Last (Though this is not a video - this was very important for me because I was “hoping” for the Golden Age to come, and I saw that nothing is coming until we change ourselves)
http://desteni.co.za/Osho/Osho5.htm

Matrix 8 on Secret of Self Support
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdZTar_b8Fw

Matrix 9 on Secret of Self Direction
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VLgCqJCX ... relatedMat

Anonymous: On the Death of Me Series
Playlist http://www.youtube.com/playlist?p=PL748006A4A67494CC

Emotions and the Law of One
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iH-0XJ0ZIqo

The WORLD has gone MAD!!!! - DesteniProductions
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdnl4YAsYoY

The Secret of Humans: Playlist http://www.youtube.com/playlist?p=PLE4EA69FEF9F88CF4

Audrey Hepburn on Friends and Family 1/2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LplxHbHx2mo

Audrey Hepburn Family and Friends 2/2 - How do I support ME?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haY0Z7ZjX70

Earth Youself - BirthYourself
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcYBRxaAPOQ

Wanting More is Creating War

The War Within Creates Wars

How can the abuse that is going on in the world be my fault? I do not rape or kill others.

I was reading lesson one from Desteni I Process called “Self as Creator”.

“With in you exists judgments, morality, jealousy, fear, polarity, anger, uncertainty, inferiority, superiority, inner conflict, sorrow, sadness and separation. These experiences are created form pictures and ideas created by the mind.”

 These experiences create War within = Our World outside.

Something clicked in me - I saw a deception I had not seen or understood clearly.

I was holding onto an idea that what was outside of me was not me. I was seeing it as, “I want the world to change”. I do not deserve a world like this, and am better than what I see as this world. Well what I am seeing is- that all the thoughts, emotions, and feelings I have are creating the energy that feeds the world systems. Thoughts in my mind are no better than everyone else.

I had the believe and desire that I wanted something better, thus creating a friction and polarity and within, I then judged others for wanting to feed their desires that cause abuse, when as desires is a desire - that causes separation and the feeding of less than and lack. So here I am judging others for what they do, and not seeing I am doing the same.

I also saw the backchat saying that I have done enough “good” things, and then the backchat that I am not doing enough. I was a house divided pulling back and forth within me, an internal war, instead of just being HERE - Breath.  To expose who we really are, is not dividing self - it is claming self so we can see what we have been accepting and allowing within our thoughts. It is not to judge ourselves for it, but to allow ourselves to see it within ourselves, so we can stop, breath forgive ourselves for how we have been creating this world - and then change who we have been. To want more is creating War.

We can start to change our nature with the Desteni I Process

And we can start to change our world by supporting the Equal Money System where All of Life will have the chance to live with Dignity