Sunday, September 26, 2010


Step 1. First look at your own thoughts of separation, abuse, judgments and fears
Step 2. Forgive yourself for All these things
Step 3. Walk in your action of Self Forgiveness daily to see and uncover all the limiting believes we have accepted and allowed that do not support Life equally.
Step 4. Start to make actual physical differences in your behavior, push yourself beyond you’re limiting believes - so that you may develop a self-trust that is not guided by emotions and feelings but an actual statement/action of you.
Step 5. Once you do these for yourself - you assist others to do the same so that All may live a dignified life.

Tools to assist - writing yourself to freedom- In self honesty writing we get to see where we are limiting ourselves and causing separation in our accepted and allowed thinking/believes.

Education- Educate you by studying “how we got here” in the first place. We must first know how we have created this reality of abuse corruption and separation so we may get a clear and precise understanding of this process. Only with this understand can we then make a change.

What Desteni and their members have done for me in my life.

I have been with Desteni for 3 years.
What I have learned so far is to push through my resistances.
Learning not to be addicted to energy of emotions and feelings.

Since Desteni -
· I have stopped drinking alcohol consistent for 20 months, which was an almost daily activity for 43 yeas
· I have started to write which I was extremely fearful of - do to my programmed experience of not doing well in school due to illness and abusive teachers.
· I have been more consistent than I ever have in my life.
· I have actually started to really like who I am becoming- where as before I had little self worth
· I have been letting go of my personality programs.
· I have started college after 34 years
· I have learned to trust myself more
· I am learning what it means to Live Life in coexistence and understanding for what is best for ALL
· I have learned and I am still learning to push myself through my limiting believes that have stopped me from living a full and dignified life.
· Learning how illnesses and dis-ease are linked to belief patterns that we have accepted and allowed and how to eventually delete these patterns though writing, self-honesty and self-forgiveness.
· Learning how to spend/use money in a way that is best for me and also best for all.
· I am learning how to support others who are interested in making a change in their life and others.

For further assists and support with Your Process there is an Equal Life Support Course
(Desteni Income Plan -
that is also an income opportunity for one who participates and qualifies by doing the course requirements.

You can contact me though a Facebook message (Adele Caskey) or leave a comment here if you would like to be on a list for more information about the course and income opportunity. There are at this time Limited enrollment and requirements for the course.

We do not believe in a God that will take care of us. We believe that we are the Gods who create this world and it is up to Us to take responsibility. “We are the Image and Likeness of God”
We do not believe that “just thinking loving/positive thoughts” will change the world or us as this is a separation polarity believe that keeps us enslaved to the “idea” that thoughts without action will make a change and this has been the “secret” factor that has kept mankind living in abuse, separation, corruption and greed.

Friday, September 10, 2010

Extensive self judgment again

Written on 9-5-10
I have been experiencing extensive self judgment again
I say again because I thought I had stopped - but it is showing its head again as a fear of not being accepted by who ever I think I need to prove myself to. I am working on it with the SRA and am finding extensive memories where I have allowed the idea that I must prove myself to devastate me when I believed that was not fulfilled. And now I see that I am living in fear of this idea- the need to have approval of someone and of course it is never enough- I can get it then I want more - it is a really fucked up addiction to energy.
I am really tired of it- and it is manifesting physically the tiredness-

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use approval to direct my life
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want what is best for all in this world but my actions to support this behind it is the wanting to be approved of.

I realized in my being that Desteni message is 100% of common sense and logically I see it clearly- but my self-movement starting point is to be approved of by Desteni. Well- hmm not even really Desteni -but it is about a self worth issue for myself! Ah I want to prove my self worth and thus has made Desteni the point where I may be able to do this meaning- using the idea of “what is best for all” as a dishonest point-though in my being I know it has to be so and I want it to be so- I do not like the fuck-upness of this reality- but my starting point is still in self interest in that the fucking ego is wanting to make my effort “grandiose” so to speak. I am still not “clean” with this as I see I am still addicted to the energy of doing good- doing bad = seeking approval for “good behavior”.
Damm it- I forgive myself that I am a fucked up mess of addition to energy of approval.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my existence to become one of seeking approval to fulfill me.
I forgive myself that I can not and have not lived my life for no approval at all.
I see now that I do things for the approval of others- or some imaginary unseen thing in my mind that will approve of me. I am seeking Self-approval! The imaginary thing is ME! I am seeking my own approval and have manifested it as “others” of authority.

Hmm… Why would not I give me approval- ah- because it is impossible because it is separation. Self-acceptance. I accept myself…

Even writing these words in the secret mind I just saw me imagining how this would be perceived by those who read it and hoping this writing to be approved of- what will they think? Will they see how hard I am trying? Will “they” understand me?

I am truly ashamed of myself.
I think for me I will just push to assist with spreading the message, as I believe there is probably no hope for me to honestly quit this energy fucked up addiction. And when I die I will no longer be- but I can die knowing I tried and contributed to spreading the message to stop participation in the MCS and live what is best for ALL.

Maybe now I can just do what is right- as approval or not- it is plainly just the right thing to do. No polarity needed.
I stop trying
I stop looking
I start Being
I start Doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live in polarity as judgments of good and bad
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live as a self-judgment of doing/being good or bad and thus within that I have been living in fear and constant comparison within my actions.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not being able to stop this addiction of self-judgment in me
I want to purify this- I want to be empty- I want to let go of the fear

Fear of being Wrong just came up. Ahhh Hard to do SRA for fear of doing it wrong fear of judgment for not doing it right yadee yadee yadee - same old shit.

PS stay tuned- A cool thing emerged- I saw the birth of this believe!
Will post it later.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Education - Punishment

Pie Chart from SRA Course
Education - schools
Fearful - annoying-
Fearful in the fact that I was abused in first grade by a teacher who would hit us with a paddle as we bent over on the table just for things like not knowing how to read or say a word correctly. As I continued with school through out my years I felt it annoying to try to please the teachers and do good work. I do not think kids should be pushed to learn by punishment. As that left me feeling unworthy as a human and not respected as a child. Thus I grew up an angry little kid and then carried the unworthiness feeling through out my life as the feeling and fear of I might “let someone down” by not performing to their standards.